Day 1

Numero Uno day of my "new" job hunt since I've moved to California.. Just applied to alot of places online.. who knows if they are hiring.. I really dont care I just doin all that I can to make this job hunt affective. SEARS was supposidly giving me my job back but idk seems kinda fake just because I can never get intouch with my supervisor and today she was supposed to call me and never did. so FUCK them untill further notice.. anywhoooo. These cramps fuckin SUCK! I dont understand why, well I do understand why but I dont understand why we have to go thru this stupid menstrual cycle AND IM GETTING OFF MINE so wtf! tmi? too BAD! yea soooo my husbands scooter-- yes scooter,  we are 20 years old. Give us a break ;) -- was stollen right out off our back porch by some lil boys hahaha. It was a cool it was like a scooter but had two parts for the feet and u had to move ur body to get it to go.. idk how good of a description that was but oh well u get the point his scooter was stolen LMAO.

Whoa..

So yesterday I logged onto my OLD myspace and saw some of the old messages between me and my ex. WHOA. How could I have been so used and played and sprung and just EW. I was like obsessed with him and he would just reply to my paragraph messages with one and a half sentences that just says a little of nothing. I had old messages between me and girls telling me about how he was cheating and not claiming to be with me and the message after that would be me telling them off for lieing when we would get back together. I looked SO STUPID. I couldnt believe my eyes lol. But it made me feel good about myself because I noticed how stupid I looked and I felt smarter. I felt like I was looking into a nieve you girls life shaking my head wishing I could tell her some advice. But I didnt need to because I know better now. Kudos to me because I have a man who loves me that I dont have to fight with him constantly.. check his phone.. cry for him to pretend he cares.. beg to stop ignoring me. He would never ignore me and if I cry he is ready to kill what/whoever is the reason for the tears. Yea we fight but not for anything serious.. WERE MARRIED, ofcourse we argue.. but about the lack of blanket and who used up all the hot water lol. THAT is my love.. I dont know what kind of life I would be living if I was still with the past. Thank God for my present and future (:

Mother may I ?

Sooo due to the fact my roommate proved to be a stage one crack whore, we moved BACK to the Bay with my mother-in-law. I cant deal with that kind of unstableness. I think that may have been the reason I was so stressed out. I was worried that I was gonna have to pick up more slack then I originally was gonna be responsible for because she had no drive what so ever. First off, she had NO intention on getting a job. If she did she sure fooled me. She NEVER went job hunting and when she gets on a computer its only to go on Facebook. Like really? Get serious. Secondly, She had got her car towed and  needed to go to court because it was a CRIMINAL TICKET with FIVE violations. She didnt go so she had a warrant for her arresst. That means.. If she gets taken in, I will be soely responsible for all the bills. NO THANK YOU. So before it got to that point I did what I had to do to save myself and my future. I got my name OFF the lease and moved to Cali. Now out here it is indeed about 300 dollars more expenive to live. So we plan to stack our money and when we can put a hefty down payment on a apartment OF OUR OWN, we will move back.

Thats the plan for now. We will see how it goes. (:

My oh my..

I'm at the library with my husband and he's already starting to bug me complaining that I'm on my phone too much. Man shut up im on facebook! It's really nice outside today but even still I don't feel like catching the bus across town to submit this resume. I wish I had my car ): but anyway. My birthday is the 12 and I have no sense of excitement what so ever. That's sad. I don't even have an artificial sense of excitement. I really hope my life turns up sometime real soon I hate being so negative all the time..

I wish..

I wish I had a job. I wish I would have saved up instead of being a irresponsible spender. I wish I could of kept my car and drove it out here instead of selling it. I wish my mother would drop her issue and text me back when I say happy mothers day. I wish my hair wasn't damaged from the tiny bit if heat I put on it
. I wish my cable would cut back on. I wish it wasnt so damn hot in this state! I wish it would rain. I wish my husband would act right. I wish electricity was free. I wish had a live in Mexican food chef. I wish I didn't have to steal cable and I could have directv. I wish everyone would at least understand English. I wish I could have had more fun in highschool. J wish I would have focused more in highschool and made better grades. Lemme stop its getting out of control. If only wishes came true dammit!

Update on the job hunt:

Areo never called ): the interview at the hotel went good Im gonna call the guy tomorrow I really hope this goes well. I also have to go to a job interview to be a health awareness coach.. Idk how that's gonna work, lol, but we shall see.

Sheesh I try really hard not to feel sorry for myself but fuck being poor is NOT FUN! I couldnt afford prescription medicine yesterday.. It was like, $6. I felt so stupid telling the lady not to ring them up. I need a job man!

Stressed!

Damn man! Why is this thing called life so hard ): I try my hardest to stay positive but its really hard when everything goes bad. I feel so sad all the time. It takes a toll on my relationship too cuz when I'm mad or irritated it becomes everyones problem and my husband has a bad temper so bad attitude smart mouth and bad temper is a bad mixture. Luckily we can look passed it and move on from the stupid fights.
I have a job interview on thursday and hopefully areo calls tomorrow. That would make my day (: I need a job man! That would make my world ten times better I'm always in a better mood when im working. Just less stress all together.

19 and Married!?

Yes. It was love at first sight.. Literally. Honestly I think it was ment to be. It started in the 1980's back when our grandmas were bestfriends, because of them our moms who were going to the same highschool became bestfriends. In 1991 our moms became prego at the same time and right after we were born they had a fall out. For 18 years we never met untill his Grandma, may she rest in peace, passed away. The day of her funeral is the day we met. That was over a year ago and now I call that man my husband and rock his last name (:

-Mrs. Blake